I got two questions for this lovely Friday morning. Why is it not illegal for 18-wheelers to drive in the left lane? There should be no reason at all any of those vehicles should travel faster than 60 mph on the highway and if you aren’t driving faster than 60, you probably shouldn’t be in the left lane. I understand time constraints and traffic and even your wife nags for you ten minutes longer than you allotted so you got to make that time up somewhere but you are driving a kazillon ton (weight approximate) wrecking machine down the highway. How about we all just take a deep breath and be happy you still have trucks to drive because in my future, the one that doesn’t exist for some reason, the highways would be for trains. Trains trains everywhere thereby allowing humans to be much sweeter to everyone else because there is no stress of sitting in traffic because some jackass can’t drive and drink coffee at the same time. The machine that runs the train can now do all the work. This, of course, will never happen. The auto industry is just too profitable still to trade for trains especially due to the massive upfront costs (you know, half a trillion kind of number or so) but maybe one day we can give up a little bit of that freedom that comes with driving our own vehicles and get a whole new freedom in return. Do you know how drunk you can get when you don’t have to operate heavy machinery?
Second question. My vernacular needs an systems update. What has replaced cool, dope, and radical in today’s lexicon? My hip word choices are the Windows 98 version whereas I would like to at least be on Windows 7. Drop a comment and let me know what are my alternatives and I will teach you the word phrasing I learned today. Ghetto tumbleweed. Ghetto tumbleweed is defined as pieces of weave left in the streets from some situation that arose causing hair to be left behind. Use it in a sentence? There was a patch of ghetto tumbleweeds left in the streets after a few of the girls from the neighborhood got together for a fistacuffs that ended with a lot of pulled hair.